5 Ways to Deal With a Situation When You are Earning More than Your Man
In a traditional ideal marriage, it is considered that a man needs to earn more than his wife, such that he can take care of his family without having to use even a single penny of his wife’s money. However, as times are changing and the job market is getting tougher day by day, one does not really know who will end up in a higher paying job – you or your husband.
In most cases, where the man is really open-minded about this, and is also very supportive of his wife’s career and ambitions, there is usually no problem. However, if he has a male ego that needs to be tamed every now and then, then you may have to do some extra homework to avoid bitterness in your marriage, coming out of the difference in your paychecks. Here are some ways in which you can deal with the situation when you are earning more than your man.
1. Don’t make it obvious
If you earn more money, don’t make it obvious by going on lavish shopping trips with your friends, and coming back with multiple bags full of new things. This can make your husband feel a little jealous, to say the least, because for all you know, he may have been sacrificing buying new things for himself for a long time now, to pay bills at home. So don’t increase your personal expenditures for no reason at all, as that will make it obvious, and more ‘in your face’ to your husband that you are earning more than him.
2. Let him be the man
In cases when you are going for dinner, or when the kids request for new things, let him be the one who pays. That will make him feel that he is still the provider of the family. Let him be the man and enjoy his responsibilities like before. Don’t forcefully try to contribute, as that will only make him feel bad. Plus, when he refuses to buy the kids something saying that he doesn’t have money right now, don’t jump in saying that you can buy it instead. He is the man of the house, and for him, his paycheck will decide what the kids will get, and how the family spends.
3. Surround him with respectful people
From kids to close friends to extended relatives, everyone who comes around him or near him should be respectful of him, feeling proud of how he is handling his family well. Nobody should be rubbing it in his face that he is living off his wife’s money, or that the wife would have been better off with someone else, or that the kids would be better if they survived on their mom’s income etc. These kinds of thoughts coming from external parties can trigger the wrong emotions and feelings in him, and can cause him to feel bad about himself.